HAPPY HOME: A NECESSITY FOR THE CHILD’S SUCCESS IN LIFE
Introduction: A happy home, in this context, is synonymous to a happy family. It should be mentioned pointblank from the outset that true happiness is found only in God. So a happy family is the Godly family. A family comprises the parents (father and mother) and their children in a nuclear setting. Extended family, on the other hand, encompasses the larger family. For the purpose of this write-up (which target audience includes not only the parents, but also the children, who will ultimately become parents), I would like to concentrate more on the nuclear family.
As a teacher and a counsellor, with the first-hand experience gathered over the years, I should like to delve into the need for the child to enjoy the necessities of a happy home in order to succeed in life. Many homes are in disarray. It is alarming the rate at which marriages are being broken, families crumbling and hence, homes shattered and success of such children in question being threatened and their aspirations in live jeopardized.
This phenomenon cuts across the “globe” and it has culminated in the anomalies noticeable in our world today which includes thuggery, cyber-crimes, yahoo plus, cultism, armed-robbery, prostitution, rapes, abortion, indecency, treachery, debauchery, drunkenness, harmful indulgencies, insubordination, greed, pride, intolerance, kidnapping, sectarian murder, moral decadence, perjury, impersonation, inhuman and nefarious activities just to mention a few. Many children would have ended great in life but for the scattered homes. Quite a number of students are performing below expectation in respect of their education just because the home is always boiling and incondusive.
While the various institutions of learning are trying frantically to shapen the child and secure a bright future for them, it should be noted that parents at home should not relent in their own duties as well. They should not use the citadels of learning as dump-site for their failed responsibilities.
Needless to say, a happy home is like a building that comprises some building blocks, which if there arises any missing link, could lead to the child’s failure in life. These building blocks would be unraveled as we consider the responsibilities of the stake-holders that constitute the happy home.
The Parents: The Parents, being the channels through which the children are brought forth, owe their children the duty of care and love. As such they are expected to provide, among other things, the following ‘building blocks’ in the family: Food, Clothing, Shelter and protection, Security, Education and empowerment, Spiritual guidance and counseling, Medical care, Companionship and Moral support.
It has been widely believed that the necessities of life are Food, Shelter and clothing. However, items contained in the above paragraph confirms that the parents have a long way to go if success is what they desire for their children.
Time and space will not permit to expatiate much on the foregoing building blocks. However, it is worthy of note that both parents need to collaborate together in order to achieve success in these areas: The mother, as the second-in-command in the family, is expected to play a supportive role with the father in all the above-listed building blocks.
FOOD: Every child deserves food in the right quantity and the right quality as well.
CLOTHING: It is the duty of parents to provide cloths for their children, else whoever helps to provide this to the child, other than the parents, might not unlikely take undue advantage of such children.
SHELTER: The best practice is for the parents to have planned ahead and provide conducive accommodation for their children and hence protect them from intruders and bad influence of peer groups.
SECURITY: The children have the right to be secure under the tutelage of their parents in all respects in order not to suffer from the grip of inferiority complex that is capable of eroding their success in life.
EDUCATION AND EMPOWERMENT: The child has the right, devoid of discrimination, to quality education. Education in this context refers to sound religious, academic, moral training and the likes from the outset. “It is impossible to bend a fish when already smoke-dried or sun-dried, so goes a wise saying.” Catch them young!
Furthermore, the child has to be put on the right footing even after graduation from a high school. They need financial and moral empowerment in order not to join the band wagon of the unemployed youths.
SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE AND COUNSELLING: According the Holy Bible, God implores every parent to “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Prov 22:6)
MEDICAL CARE: “Health is wealth”. Parents take note. Keep your children healthy always.
COMPANIONSHIP AND MORAL SUPPORT: The first port of call of the child is the parent. So they should not be disappointed when it comes to the issue of companionship and moral support in all issues of life.
Sadly enough, none of the above necessities of life can be provided by a broken home. A happy home is the answer. May God continue to sustain our homes in Jesus Name.
Mrs. Favour O. ONIGBINDE
(Bsc. Biochemistry; PGDE; M. Ed Guidance & Counselling)